When a man leaves you, you can’t be sure if he wants a new feeling and relationship; or maybe he doesn’t perceive his change of feelings to you. Relationship change, they can rise into new quality or cease.
First of all, you should try to find out why he is leaving. What was missing to him being with you? Maybe something was too much? Don’t rush to answer yourself. Think carefully. Even if your man said it quite clearly, remember that many men avoid saying the real reasons that might hurt and tell the other things.
Trying to make sure you understood the reason why he is breaking up with you; try to remember situations when his face and mood would change for the worse. Maybe when he used to bring his drunken fellows to your home and you would grumble in the kitchen? Maybe when you used to flirt with another man? Maybe when you used to mumble about the lack of money and no attention while he was watching the basketball?
If you are sure you know the real reasons, think honestly: would you give him what he wants if there’s another chance? If you still think his needs and wishes are simply his caprices you must fight with and that he still needs to be educated…it is worthless to get him back then. It is better to find a man whose needs are more like yours.
Second step: try to clear your relationship with him. Avoid drama, accusations and explanations, because your man will be either ready to get back with his replies at your usual accusations, or simply don’t listen to the same old stories. This would only make a bigger distance between you too. What you should really do is to show you acknowledge his freedom and you don’t claim him. Try to stay calm and express your need to know what happened and where you were wrong. In this life people don’t listen too much, thus it is mostly believable he would open and tell things out if you master the calm way to approach him.
If you listened to him, analyzed your ideas about his needs and still believe you can both work on the issues and especially yourself, you should clearly express that you heard him and you understood what he meant, that things can be changed for the better if you try and if he is willing to give another chance to your relationship. However, if your man wants you to obey him unconditionally and give up your own self and dreams, think “is it worth to renew such relationship?”
Give your man time to think, but don’t show him you will wait him forever by any means. Otherwise you can always remain his back up plan. Ask him clearly he wants you to have another man, make love to him and even get married. You should ask him if it doesn’t hurt him not so see you anymore. If he resists on breaking up, do not leave him any hopes to see you in the future: if he leaves you, it is as if he passes you over to another man. It is easy to give a person to another one if you don’t love him. And it is hard if you love.
If you feel he still has feelings left for you, try to revive love- conquer your partner again. Be active; communicate with other people, especially men. Let your ex see you can live independently, you are beautiful and attractive to other men and that maybe he is losing his chance. Minimize communication with him. You should clearly state if he leaves you, there’s no way back, because you are not his back up plan. Take a break from him, give him time to think and, hopefully, to miss you.
Only knowing the answers to all the questions might help you to get him back or simply accept the truth and let him go. Good luck!
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